Before he did the Spider-Man trilogy, director Sam Raimi did tacky, intentionally over-the-top horror flicks, and did them very well. Consider his latest, ‘Drag Me to Hell’, a return to form. It is a horrifying and actually rather compelling story: A bank loan officer named Christine denies an old, somewhat frightening woman an extension on her mortgage. She puts an ancient curse on Christine, that gives her 3 days to appease the devil or else she will be dragged into hell for all eternity.

It sounds ridiculous on paper and it still is ridiculous in the movie itself. But it’s just all too much fun to truly care. It’s over-the-top, and completely unrealistic. Eyes melting out, dead bodies grabbing people, even a simple fight scene is played for laughs. Although it’s not really scary, ‘Drag Me to Hell’ is really creepy and gory for a PG-13. It’s not evil horror, it’s campy horror. But the easily frightened will pee their pants, no questions asked.

Alison Lohman as the haunted woman, Christine, plays the “horror movie girl” stereotype really well. She has a sweet, innocent quality that makes you really care for her character as the film’s increasingly ludicrous events progress. She can also scream really well, a talent no doubt necessary for a horror movie. ‘Drag Me to Hell’ is not a politically charged satire. Nor is it a frivolous frat boy comedy. Nor is it an Academy-Award winning epic about the struggle to move a mountain. It’s about a girl not trying to get dragged to hell. Take it or leave it. Tons of fun. ***/****

Will Ferrell plays an explorer trapped in a parallel universe in the TV show adaptation Land of the Lost. Will Ferrell has never really been in an action film before, but he plays the exact same messed-up man-child character that he’s played in all of his comedies. I really do like Will Ferrell, but Land of the Lost is no action comedy. It lacks comedy, and the action sequences mostly retread other, better films.

The film opens up with Matt Lauer interviewing Dr. Rick Marshall (Ferrell). Marshall claims that some subatomic particles can be harnessed to travel to parallel dimensions, and take fossil fuel from there. Lauer’s dismissal of this theory leads to Marshall beating up Lauer. Three years later, the incident left Marshall alone, branded a lunatic by the science world.

But using some freaky-deaky machine that the film barely explains, Marshall travels back with a female assistant (who becomes the clichéd love interest) and a Southern druggie (played hilariously by Danny McBride). Soon it becomes clear this is no ordinary place, with aliens and jungles and vinyl turntables and caverns and motel pools. Marshall must get back to the normal world with his friends and evade a very intelligent T-Rex.

It feels all too familiar, perhaps because of the uncanny resemblances to Journey to the Center of the Earth? Ferrell isn’t even all that funny in it, he himself looks incredibly bored even when he’s running from a Tyrannosaurus Rex. Anna Friel just walks around and says her lines as the love interest, whose name I forgot. Danny McBride as the redneck whose name I also forgot is the funniest one of the bunch. The film alternates between epic special effects sequences and corny parts with awful alien suits that stuntmen are clearly in.

Oddly the best parts are the beginning and the end. Matt Lauer and Will Ferrell squaring off at the beginning was a funny scene in a huge disappointment. The end was good because A: Matt Lauer and Will Ferrell reunite and B: it finally was over. D+

I’ll make this point once, although the contents of this review will only re-enforce this point: The people at Pixar are gods. The beautiful animation they create, the unforgettable characters they bring to life, the humor they lace their products with, they make films like no other company or filmmaker, let alone any other animation studio. If Wall-E was a miniature, animated, romantic, epic in space, then Up is a buddy chase adventure comedy. With a talking dog. To sum it up with significantly less adjectives: Up is awesome.

If the film’s first act is uneven, it involves us so much we don’t care. It introduces us in 1939 to a young budding adventure named Carl Frederickson who idolizes a man named Charles Muntz. Muntz flies around the world in a giant blimp, bringing back skeletons of other-worldly creatures. This passion for adventure causes him to meet a girl named Ellie. In the best part of the film, a montage takes us through their marriage and Ellie’s eventual death.

Present-day. Carl’s quaint old neighborhood is being monopolized, fast-food restaurants and skyscrapers sprouting up everywhere. Given that his house sticks out like a sore thumb, Carl is forced to relocate to a retirement home. However, Carl ties thousands balloons to his house (yes, it makes no sense) and sails away, towards South America, to fulfill his and his late wife’s dream.

This paradise is quickly interrupted, when Carl realizes a young, pudgy wilderness explorer, Russell has stowed away on his front porch. Some characters Carl and Russell encounter include a group of talking dogs (one of them, Dug, they befriend), a colorful, rare bird they name Kevin, and Charles Muntz himself, who proves to be the villain of the film. (After 70 years alone in the jungle, naturally he’s gone insane.)

Pixar’s extraordinary track record is kept in accord here, this is yet another modern animated classic. Most of the film is set in the South American jungle, and the vistas are gorgeous. Up is to South America what Ratatouille is to food: So realistic and eye-popping, you want to eat it. Or in Ups case, touch it. It has some cool action, but its always hysterically funny, thanks to the talking dog Dug. His lines include “My name is Dug. I just met you, and I love you. SQUIRREL.”

The voice acting is good, with Ed Asner playing the cranky protagonist, Carl. All in all, Up is excellent. Its interesting premise, incredible animation, and the fact it’s actually really funny make for a film that can’t be missed. I don’t care how old you are. A

Ben Stiller returns as museum security guard Larry Daley in ‘Night at the Museum 2′. The first film revolved around his struggle to retain order in a museum – when a magical tablet brought all the exhibits and sculptures literally to life. Flash forward three years. Daley is now a millionaire off of selling such hot products as glow in the dark flashlights, leaving behind his old job as museum night guard.

But the museum undergoes reconstruction, sending all its old exhibits to the Smithsonian National Archives – and the magical tablet with it. When Daley realizes this he flies to Washington DC and sneaks into the underground National Archives – only to realize that the tablet has brought to life every single exhibit, person, painting, sculpture and plane in all 17 Smithsonian museums.

An assortment of villains – Napoleon Bonaparte, Al Capone (cleverly rendered in black-and-white), Ivan the Terrible, and an evil prince named Kahmunrah come out and seize the tablet to use for their own evil ends. Daley then teams up with Amelia Earhart to retrieve the tablet, save Larry’s friends, and restore order throughout the Smithsonian complex.

The film is littered with dozens upon dozens of cameos. Ricky Gervais, Saturday Night Live star Bill Hader as General Custer, Robin Williams as Teddy Roosevelt, the Tuskegee Airmen, Owen Wilson as Jebediah, and Jay Baruchel. Jonah Hill has a brief, but hilarious role as a tight-wound Smithsonian security guard. Even the Jonas Brothers show up as three singing baby cherubs. (This produced at least 15 teenage squeals in my theater) Ben Stiller does admittedly look a little bored, but he’s generally funny.

However, its two actors that make the movie click. Amy Adams as Amelia Earhart brings an enthusiastic zing to the whole film, gleefully delivering exclamations like “We’ve been jimjacked!” and “Great Gatsby!”, and spontaneously kissing Ben Stiller from time to time. And Hank Azaria, a voice actor from ‘The Simpsons’, plays the evil Kahmunrah as an eccentric freak with an odd lisp, but is still convincingly evil. He gets the best scenes. A personal favorite of mine being when Darth Vader and Oscar the Grouch audition for being Kahmunrah’s minions, whilst Kahmunrah belittles Darth Vader about his cape and his heavy breathing.

Special effects are present in virtually every frame of the film. Although a couple sequences are redundant, (Daley and Earhart flying her plane out of the Air and Space museum) some moments are particularly awe-inspired. There is an extent of magic to seeing a walking, talking, full-size Lincoln Memorial interact with Ben Stiller, and eventually plays a big role in the film’s climax.

Long story short, it’s much better than the mostly bland first film, and I think that can be equally attributed to the great cast and the awesome visual effects. And the fact that the first wasn’t very good. It improves on the original. A good choice for families. B+

A theory I’ve developed when it comes to romantic comedies: The plot is almost exactly the same every time, despite varying in scenario, concept, etc. What determines a good one from a bad one is how much the characters develop over the film and frankly, how witty and funny it is.

Ghosts of Girlfriends Past is yet another high-concept romantic comedy, but it borrows that high-concept from A Christmas Carol. (Sorry there Mr. Dickens) And the romance in the film feels conceited and tacked on. And the comedy? Non-existent. Beyond that two-second shot of the bride running to her destroyed wedding cake, screaming, “NO!!” The film begs us to symphatize with a self-centered jerk, and at the end that jerk is replaced in two seconds with a goody-two-shoes charmer.

Connor Mead (Matthew McConaughey, smooth and sly as ever) is a fashion photographer that gains and breaks up with girlfriends by the minute. (This is emphasized when in the beginning, he breaks up with three girls at the same time via conference call) He is cynical, selfish, and proclaims to ‘not believe in love’.

When he is invited to his brothers wedding for a weekend, he encounters his childhood girlfriend Jenny (Jennifer Garner). After making a fool of himself at dinner, he is visited by the ghost of his old Uncle Wayne (a deliciously loathable Michael Douglas), who has taught him his irresponsible ways. He will be visited by three ghosts to represent all his past, present, and future girlfriends. They will take him through his own romantic past, to help him get back his one love – Jenny.

Matthew McConaughey, in his seemingly nineteenth consecutive romantic comedy role, plays a complete, utter jerk. We are forced to stick with this jerk for 90 minutes, while he literally experiences his past over again. But suddenly he opts to be good for his crush, Jenny. As Jenny, Jennifer Garner has 15 minutes during which she looks…bored. Michael Douglas chews up the scenery as his Uncle Wayne, who despite being a ghost is probably the most developed character in the film.

We all know the ending, unless this is your first chick flick. The performances are (mostly) bland, its unfunny, without much in the way of romance, or humor, which tends to mostly be the saving point of chick flicks. Pointless garbage. D

‘Terminator Salvation’ is a giant departure from the other three films. The original three were mostly chase films, although the first was mostly horror and the others were mainly action chase films. This fourth film sports an all-new cast, all-new director, and all-new tone and plot. It’s completely about the war between the evil computer-controlled machines and humans, instead of focusing on humans trying to evade just one cyborg. Naturally, this makes for a film with a much wider scale, and it juggles about 8 characters. Some are very well-developed, and interesting. Others are there simply to advance the plot.

The first three films about the effort to keep John Connor alive. Several machines from an all-ruling computer company Cyberdyne, or ‘Terminators’, were sent back in time to assassinate him, as his leadership will win the future war of men vs. machines. Eventually Cyberdyne triggered a missile launch that annihilated most of the world. The surviving humans were either put into camps by the machines or escaped and formed a resistance against them.

The year is 2018. John Connor is a high-ranking soldier within the Resistance, and stumbles upon a new plan for a much deadlier Terminator. Meanwhile, a man named Marcus Wright breaks out of a Cyberdyne holding facility. His last memory is from 2003, of being on death row. When the two unite, they hatch a plan to potentially destroy Cyberdyne. But Kyle Reese, a young teenager who via time travel will eventually became Connor’s father, is being targeted by thousands of machines. Can Connor rescue Reese, defeat Cyberdyne and remain alive?

The film has gained a bit of notoriety because of the star Christian Bale’s infamous meltdown on the set (reportedly 34 F-bombs in a 3-minute clip). However the performances are all very good. Bale brings a gruff demeanor yet still maintains a deep vulnerability as John Connor. A problem is his personality changes throughout the series. In Terminator 2 John was a 10-year old punk and petty thief, in the third he was a 20-something scared pansy, and now he’s a gruff, tough soldier. Rapper Common has a brief role, and he’s decent. Ron Howard’s daughter, Bryce Dallas (of Spider-Man 3) has a role as John’s wife, Kate. A major problem is that she had such a major, vital role in the third and here she is reduced to about 5 minutes. You learn nothing about her, and I wouldn’t even know who she was had I not seen the third.

There are two very memorable roles in the film: Sam Worthington as Marcus Wright. He’s a mysterious traveler with a very big secret, and for most of the film we don’t know whether to trust him or not. Worthington steals every scene he’s in, it’s a very intense, demanding character and he pulls it off. The other memorable performance: Arnold Schwarzenegger. Despite not filming a single scene himself, digital effects use his likeness from 1984 to project his original character, the T-800. (for those unfamiliar, a killing machine disguised as a human) I won’t reveal how he’s used, but hardcore fans will be very pleased.

The film is chock-full of references to the original trilogy. Since it’s a departure in theme and plot, ‘Salvation’ sports pretty much non-stop explosions and chases. Many pop up randomly for no reason, others truly serve the plot. A personal favorite of mine being a scene where Marcus and Kyle evade a giant hovercraft, air tanker, and 70-foot tall killing robot. A common attribute being that they are mind-blowing in execution. Another great part is the cinematography. It tends to jump from shaky camera-work to stunning long-shots of incredible action, but its all great.

The weakness, like so many action films, lies the dialogue and plotting. Many lines my friend and I accurately predicted to ourselves about 5 seconds before they were uttered. Other lines we repeated to ourselves for the rest of the day, each one to roaring laughter. Many plot holes ensue, such as: John Connor rigs a couple fuel cells used by Terminators to explode, stating that it will detonate a building. However when fighting a Terminator up close (fuel cells intact) Connor has no problem blowing it up 10 feet away with a rocket launcher.

My general liking of ‘Terminator Salvation’ is because of the great performances, incredible action, and the fact that I’ve worshipped the first two for 5 years. However, the awful dialogue and under-developed characters seriously slows it down. Great entertainment. B

Imagine a ‘Star Trek’ that isn’t convoulted beyond belief, that you don’t need a Trek fan-to-English dictionary to understand. Where half-hour conversations about morals don’t make up the majority of the running-time. Where you actually, truly understand what the heck is going on, without worrying about Klingons or Romulans or Vulcans or whatever. Simple, pure fun, that could also please the devoted Star Trek fans, or ‘Trekkies’, or ‘Trekkers’ (of which there are many). That could please even those who viciously oppose that it stands for (of which there are many). Ladies, gentlemen, germs, teenage boys, enter ‘Star Trek’.

The film is set in a separate universe from all of the original films. It starts around 2400 or something in space, with a starship suddenly being destroyed by another, much bigger one, that is populated by a race called Romulans. They apparently have an agenda for revenge, although the leader of the ship, Nero, is tight-lipped on what for. During the ship’s evacuation a baby is born, named James Kirk. Flash forward 20 years, on Earth. Kirk is an intelligent albeit reckless rebel, driving cars off cliffs for kicks. He is recruited to join to Starfleet Academy, to take up the legacy of his father and work on starships.

Meanwhile on a separate planet, Spock is a young who feels shame because despite being raised to ignore emotions and concentrate on logic (its the Vulcan way), his half-human heritage burdens him in this process. Kirk befriends Uhura and a medic named Leonard McCoy upon joining the Starfleet Academy. He is suspended after cheating on a test, but boards the new, giant USS Enterprise anyway. Despite ethical conflict with Captain Spock, they must bond together to defeat Nero.

It’s rather hard to fully explain the plot without giving too much away. The plot sounds fairly simple but it’s much more complex, involving power drills, nuclear weapons, time travel, etc. However, the film decently paces itself so that all these revelations aren’t overwhelming. In addition, it unleashes several major action sequences. Ditto the very end where the two giant starships face off, or a scene where three people parachute from the starship onto a drill thats suspended 5,000 feet into the air. It also pokes fun but respects the original films, retaining the original characters and their quirks, to the original ships, to even the original sound effects.

The acting is top-notch all around. Simon Pegg is very funny as the ship engineer Scotty, and Karl Urban is good as medic Leonard McCoy. Chris Pine has a certain bravura as James Kirk that demonstrates charm and wit. But there are two performances that put this film above and beyond: Zachary Quinto as a young Spock. He speaks almost mechanically, but effectively demonstrates the inner emotional turmoil that Spock feels. His scenes with Kirk are the best in the film, with an undertone of logic versus instinct. The very best performance in the film is also Spock – but the much older Spock played by the original, Leonard Nimoy. I won’t reveal how he figures into the plot and how he is alongside a young version of him, but it’s a tender, mostly somber, occasionally funny performance. The visual effects are stunning, as are the sound effects. The moments where there’s just silence in space are even more effective than the big flashy action.

I could perhaps liken ‘Star Trek’ and its predecessors to ‘Batman Begins’ and its predecessors: A shot of adrenaline and a heart transplant to a dying franchise. A corny analogy, but relevant nonetheless: ‘Star Trek’ removes what made the recent Star Trek’s so hard to comprehend. It adds more action. It presents engaging, interesting versions of the characters. Every single actor in ‘Star Trek’ likely faces stardom now. Here’s hoping this new version of the series lives long and prospers. A